Down in the dumps!!!

Why is my luck so miserable?
its like I dont have any freedom T.T
and that's very bad you know!!
its not that i dont want to fulfill anything but...
ok!! blame it on me then!!!
ALL MY FAULT lorh~!!
well all the words I say wasnt EXCUSES
to you maybe they are
but seriously I didnt puposely NOT go for it
its just that...im BUSY for the whole week!!!
and its not that this thing is still fresh to you
but Ive already told you that im busy for a whole week and I ask for your apology!!
Ive already repeat this thing over and over again
did you ever saw it?
it was there...right there before your very eyes
you closed your eyes by then right?
you didnt accept my apology
thats ok then....
but I cant believe that you dont believe my words
i was being very sincere with you
you wouldnt put your trust in it
im truly hurt and worse off Ive lost my appetite!!
I went to find someone for help
and she consoled me nicely
but she also wouldnt believe that you guys did that to me
shocking too
I told her everything that i suppose to tell
she ask me to consult another person
but im scared...really scared that this thing will become bigger and bigger
and everyone will....you know T.T
I do not want those kinds of attitude
I just want a normal,happy life
no sorrows everything
did you all know that you've ruined my life?!
now every time when I come to school I will be living in lives of sorrow
pitiful shadows surrounding me
nobody is there to lend a helping hand
but im there standing there in the rain waiting for someone
but none came
and how do you call true friendship?
did you know what someone had did to me?
she sold my pride and prejudice away!!!
How could you!!!
my pride is all I have and now the game has ended
I have no lives back!
I wish to abolish this situation
Please help me......and let me live my own happy nice way :')